


Fairytale of New York

by LulaMadison



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Christmas, Depression, Gen, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 05:43:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5485745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LulaMadison/pseuds/LulaMadison
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the summer of 2018 Thanos attacked New York, and every Christmas Eve two of the survivors meet to talk about their fallen friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Back at the start of November 2013 I went to a ridiculously early Christmas party. Everyone groaned when the DJ kept playing Christmas songs, apart from one song: _Fairytale of New York_ by The Pogues. (Best Christmas song ever BTW. If you don't know it [click here to listen!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwHyuraau4Q)) When I got home I wrote 80% of this fic, and then couldn't find the time to finish it until now.
> 
> Please note that as I wrote the majority of this in 2013, it is set after _Thor: The Dark World_ , so is AU to the events of the films that were released after that, hence there will be no Scarlet Witch, Vision etc featured.
> 
> I will be posting one chapter a night until the final chapter on Christmas Eve.
> 
>  
> 
> **Last warning for Major Character Death. Seriously, pretty much everyone dies!**

The first time Tony ended up sitting on the floor of the drunk tank on Christmas Eve was in 2018.

The winter had been brutal, with snow thickly carpeting the ground since mid November, which had hampered the clean up operations that were still ongoing some six months after Thanos’s attack on the city.

The whole attack still seemed like a bizarre nightmare to Tony and he often woke screaming in the middle of the night, seeing the giant ship appear in the atmosphere once more.

There had been no portals this time, no evil Asgardian gods, no warnings, just a giant grey ship hovering over the skyline of New York and a booming voice that echoed across the city, promising the gift of death and destruction for all.

Doors opened in the colossal craft and waves of smaller vessels poured out, spilling through the streets and firing high-powered laser guns at anything that moved.

Fury issued frantic orders that the army would deal with the Chitauri vessels, but the Avengers were to attack the mother ship and bring it down by any means necessary.

 

 

 

Bruce had been the first to fall.

Not long after they entered the ship, through the still open hangar door, Hulk had charged from the Quinjet and attacked the Chitauri who were swarming around the deck. The Avengers looked on in horror as they realised the power of the new weapons their enemies carried, weapons strong enough to bring down Hulk, and they realised just how vulnerable they were this time.

Clint went next, Tony assumed. He'd stayed behind to defend the Quinjet so they would still have a means of escape if they needed one, but they never did find his body among the wreckage.

They fought their way through the ship; killing every soldier the Chitauri threw at them, until they came to a well-defended room.

“Gotta be something important in here, right?” Natasha asked.

“I doubt it’d be so guarded if it was where they store the toilet paper,” Tony replied.

“We need to get in there,” Steve agreed, as he smashed his shield into the head of a Chitauri soldier and crushed it against the wall.

When all the Chitauri lay at their feet, a smoking mass of black blood and indistinguishable parts, Thor smashed the door off it's hinges and entered the room.

“Loki,” Thor gasped upon seeing his brother chained to a metal table, covered in the tattered rags of his armour, with blood seeping from some hidden wound beneath the leather, which pooled at his side before dripping onto the floor. “I thought you dead.”

Thor moved swiftly across the room, and pounded at the chains with Mjolnir until they began to shatter under the blows.

“It’s gone, Thor,” Loki mumbled as Thor hauled him upright. “We tried to stop him, but we weren’t strong enough.”

“Who wasn't strong enough?” Thor asked as he wiped a trickle of blood away from the corner of Loki’s mouth.

“Asgard,” Loki said quietly. “It… it lays in ruin.”

“And father?” Thor asked.

“He was sleeping when Thanos attacked. We had no warning, no sign. I woke father and we led the Einherjar against the Chitauri together and managed to decimate over half their forces, but it was still too late.” Loki said. He shook is head and then quietly added, “Father is dead. They all are.”

“What of Sif?” Thor asked desperately. “What of Fandral and Hogan?”

“They fought bravely, but in the end they too fell,” Loki admitted.

Thor’s face turned dark. “And yet you alone live while Asgard was destroyed? What did you do? Hide in the shadows like a coward while my friends died?”

Loki jumped from the table and shoved Thor in the chest violently, pushing him up against the nearest wall and placing his forearm across Thor’s throat. “Do not _dare_ to speak to me of cowardice! You think I wanted to be captured? You think I wanted to watch while my home _burnt_ , along with every person I have ever known?”

“Guys,” Tony interrupted. “Are you gonna fight, cos we kinda have a suicide mission to finish here and we’re on the clock.”

Loki looked at Tony, then back at Thor, and sighed heavily as he released his arm from Thor’s throat, then said, “We have not time for this.”

“I am glad, brother,” Thor said shakily. “I am glad you still live.”

“We will not live much longer if we stay here,” Loki replied, and then he turned to Steve. “What is your plan?”

“To bring the ship down,” Steve replied.

“And then?”

“Er, that was pretty much it,” Tony replied.

“You fools,” Loki cackled. “You’re all going to die, you know?”

“Banner has already fallen, Loki,” Thor said quietly. “And I hold little hope that Agent Barton still lives.”

A brief look of shock and confusion crossed Loki’s face before he covered it with a smirk. “Then I would imagine my help is required.”

“You’d help us?” Steve asked.

“Help you defeat the monster who destroyed the kingdom that is rightfully mine?” Loki asked with a raised eyebrow. “I will not rest until he lies in tatters at my feet.”

“That’s good enough for me,” Natasha replied, and Tony nodded in agreement.

Thor fixed Loki with a pointed stare. “And later we shall discuss your lies, once this is over.”

“What lies?” Loki asked incredulously.

“The fact that you faked your own death and left me to suffer in grief for years on end _again_ ,” Thor said roughly.

“Oh get over it, Thor,” Loki snapped as he moved towards the door. “Anyone would think you weren't happy to see me.”

 

 

 

Loki led the remaining Avengers down into the bowels of the ship where they fought a brigade of Chitauri soldiers that were guarding a heavily fortified room. The door had proved a problem, until Tony had located a hidden panel in the wall and managed to short-circuit the electrics inside it.

As the door slid open the Avengers entered and small lights in the floor began to flood the cavernous room with light.

“This…” Thor started as he looked around the room at the items that stood on short display pillars. “This is the contents of the weapons vault.”

“Thanos ransacked it and had everything brought here,” Loki said as he walked into the room and began to walk between the pillars.

They followed him as he wend a path down the space, until finally he stood before a pillar that was surrounded by smaller pillars, at the end of the room.

“It cannot be,” Thor gasped.

“What is it?” Steve asked in confusion.

“It’s the gaudiest disco glove I’ve ever seen,” Tony quipped.

“It is the infinity gauntlet,” Thor replied. “The most powerful weapon throughout all the realms.”

“Oh, that kinda sucks,” Tony replied.

“But brother, if he has the gauntlet why does he not wield it?” Thor asked.

“Thanos only possesses five of the six infinity stones and without the final stone he lacks the power to charge it,” Loki replied. “He believes the final stone may be here on Midgard.”

“So if we could find that stone first we could use it against him?” Steve asked.

“We have no need to search,” Loki replied.

“And why is that?” Tony asked.

Loki moved his hands and the air between them began to swirl until a blue box appeared. “Because I already possess it.”

Thor watched as Loki quickly placed the casket on the final pillar before the blue colouring that had started at his fingers could spread further than his hands, and asked, “You had the casket all along? Why did you not use it when you attacked Midgard last?”

“It is a Jotun weapon,” Loki replied. “It is vile to touch in every way, but now we have need of it.”

The stones around the gauntlet began to glow and an eerie light began to swirl within each one, which then coalesced into a stream, one from each stone in different colours, each stream heading towards one of the gems attached to the gauntlet.

There was a flash of light, which caused them all to turn away, and when they looked back the stones were gone, but each one of the gems was pulsing with raw power.

“Put it on,” Loki said to Thor.

“It is a weapon of magical power, brother, surely you would be able to control it better than I?” Thor asked.

“You would trust me to wield an object of such power?” Loki asked with a raised eyebrow.

“A fair point,” Thor replied, then he reached over, picked up the gauntlet and placed it on his right hand. “What do we do now?”

“We fight,” Loki replied.

 

 

The battle to get to the control room was not easy, but with Thor wearing the gauntlet, using Mjolnir to target the Chitauri with almost pinpoint accuracy, they had quickly arrived at the central control deck of the ship.

Thor leaned heavily against the door, drawing large breaths, and then shook his head to clear it.

“Are you well?” Loki asked, laying a hand on Thor’s shoulder and then snatching it back as he was stung by the massive energy that flowed through his brother’s body. “Why did you not tell me, you fool?”

“I will manage,” Thor ground out through gritted teeth.

“You will die if you keep that thing on a moment longer. The power is too much for you to bear,”

“I will bear it,” Thor said, straightening himself up. “I have little choice.”

Thor raised his hand and they watched as the door began to warp and then vanished, revealing the empty command room and the clock that was silently counting down on the screen.

“No,” Loki said as the clock hit zero and a high-pitched sound began to echo from the depths of the ship.

Thor raised his ungloved hand, placed it on Loki’s neck and pulled him closer as the ship began to tilt and fall from the sky.

 

 

 

Tony woke, laid on his back, and staring up into a hole that extended up through the floors of two decks. He lay for a moment, his ears buzzing and his head spinning as he tried to catalogue his injuries, but then his hearing cleared and he realised someone was screaming.

He pulled himself painfully to his feet, suddenly glad of the shielding of the suit which had no doubt saved his life, and made his way over to where Loki sat with his legs bent at awkward angles, cradling Thor’s broken body in his arms.

Tony had thought that Thor was an indestructible god, that nothing could ever harm him, but the stoved in portion of his skull and his lifeless eyes dispelled that theory. Thor, the brightest, bravest and strongest being that Tony had ever known was gone.

“Loki,” Tony said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “We need to get out of here.”

Loki looked up at him with wide eyes, a river of blood running the left side of his face from an open wound on his scalp. His mouth opened and closed a few times and he finally said, “It wasn't supposed to end like this.”

“I hate to say this but Thor is gone. You can’t help him now. We need to look for the others and go,” Tony said, noting that one of Loki’s pupils was blown so wide his eye looked almost black. “There could be more explosions and all that metal above our heads looks pretty precarious so we need to get out of here before it falls.”

Loki blinked, trying to clear his vision, and then looked back at Thor. “Then let it fall. I care not.”

“You’re going to die down here an-”

“Good,” Loki interrupted.

“I know you’re upset, but I'm not leaving you here,” Tony said firmly.

“Go, now!” Loki shouted, and then he looked back up at Tony. “Leave, before I kill you myself.”

Tony’s attention was dragged away by a moan somewhere to his left, and he shouted, “Natasha? Is that you?”

“Tony?” Natasha called out.

Tony moved towards her voice and began digging in the rubble until he found her, pinned by the ankle by a fallen beam, and as he began to dig her out Loki leaned over Thor’s body again and let out a moaning wail.

 

 

It took an hour for Tony and Natasha to navigate their way out through the wreckage of the downed ship as they picked their way over debris and through the maze of blocked corridors.

They had been forced to leave Steve’s body in the command room, pinned beneath a massive girder that had cleaved his body in two, and even though he was still alive they’d been forced to leave Loki too.

He had sat weeping and rocking Thor’s lifeless corpse in his arms during the time it had taken to dig Natasha out, but eventually his cries had ceased as his breathing grew ragged and slow, and finally he slumped unconscious over his brother’s body. Tony had wanted to try to carry him out, but one tug on his arm showed that he would have been impossible to lift.

They stepped out into the fresh air, blinking at the dappled sunlight that streamed through the leaves of the few trees that still remained standing in the south east corner of Central Park, where the ship had fallen, and Tony looked out over the skyline and saw the empty space between the buildings where Stark Tower used to stand.

He hadn't known it at the time, but Thanos had seemingly realised his plan was about to be foiled, and shortly before setting the self destruct on the ship and teleporting away by some unknown means, he had ordered all the smaller Chitauri vessels to attack the tower and they had reduced it to a pile of smoking rubble.

Pepper had been at the tower at the time, and Happy had tried to get her to safety, but it was too late. It took three weeks to dig through to the basement parking garage, where they were found in the back seat of an armoured car, their arms wrapped around each other. There wasn't a single scratch on either of them, and Tony still woke from nightmares gasping for breath as he suffocated along with them in the back of the car.

 

Natasha retired the next day. Handed in her weapons and changed her name.

Tony liked to think that she made her life for herself somewhere in Florida, settled down and had baby after baby, all with gorgeous red hair.

He knew that probably wasn't true, but it was a comforting thought amid the wreckage of his life.

 

*

 

It was Christmas Eve 2018 and Tony hadn't protested at all when the police arrested him for public urination in the alley behind a run-down bar. They’d taken his details, but Tony had fallen over his own feet, started giggling, and said, “I'm sat in my own piss.”

One of the officers had knelt down in the snow next to him, placed a hand on his shoulder and said, “Mr Stark, you need to go home.”

“Home? What’s that?” Tony slurred. “You know I used to have a big _ggg_ house right in the middle of the city and then aliens knocked it down. Killed my girlfriend too, and pretty much everyone I know.”

The policemen talked with low voices, and then crouching man said, “Mr Stark, we’re going to take you somewhere safe. You shouldn't be out here all alone tonight.”

 

 

Tony sat with his back against the wall of the holding cell, surrounded by men of various ages who were all shabbily dressed.

“It’s cold out,” the old man on Tony’s right slurred.

“That it is,” Tony nodded.

“Better to be in here than out there on a night like this,” the man laughed wheezily, and then he coughed loudly. “Won’t have to worry about it much longer. Won’t see another one.”

“I live in hope,” Tony sighed.

“ _Have yourself a merry little Christmas_ ,” the old man started to sing. “ _It may be your last. Next year we may all be living in the past_.”

“Those aren't the lyrics, you old bum,” someone shouted from across the cell.

“Those are the original, proper lyrics,” the man shouted back and then he continued to sing, “ _Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Pop that champagne cork. Next year we may all be living in New York_ …”

Tony turned his face away and closed his eyes. He thought back to Christmases past and better times, of giant stuffed rabbits and stockings above the fireplace in yet another house that had be reduced to rubble.

He thought of his friends who were dead, of Steve and Bruce, of Thor and Clint.

Tony was the lucky one, wasn't he? He was still alive.

“Happy Christmas, Pepper. I love you baby,” Tony whispered to himself as he laid his head back against the wall with tears running down his face.


	2. Chapter 2

There was a clang of metal as the holding cell door opened and slammed shut, but Tony didn’t bother to turn his head to see the latest lonely drunk to be hauled in off the streets.

He heard footsteps as the new inmate crossed the curiously silent cell, and then a familiar voice said, “Move.”

Tony’s head whipped round, sure he was mistaken, but no, he really was there, clad in a smartly tailored black suit and white shirt, glaring at a drunk who was sat on the bench.

“Loki,” Tony gasped. “I thought you were dead.”

“A common misconception apparently,” Loki said, and then turned his attention back to the drunk. “Are you going to move or must I deposit you on the floor where you belong?”

The drunken man scooted to the side quickly, leaving Loki with two feet of clear bench.

“Further,” Loki said, waving his hand at the man. When Loki was finally satisfied that the man had moved far enough away he sat down.

“What are you doing here?” Tony asked.

“How can you be sure I'm really here and this isn't a delusion of your drunken mind?” Loki asked with a smirk

“Given that whatever  _you've_  been drinking smells like lighter fluid I'm pretty sure it’s a safe bet that you’re real,” Tony said, waving his hand in front of his face. “Seriously, why are you here?”

“I have come to rescue you, of course,” Loki said loudly with an extravagant wave of his arm.

“Are you drunk?” Tony asked.

“Perhaps a touch,” Loki replied with a smirk. “I’ve come to liberate you.”

“I don't know what justice is like on Asgard, but this isn't exactly the dungeons. I'm not sure I need rescuing by a drunken demigod.”

“Ah-ah, less of the demigod please,” Loki said, waving a finger in Tony’s face. “So you intend to sit here until someone posts bail for you?”

“Oh, so you know how jail here works then?”

“I have done my research,” Loki said. “Come, the city awaits us and we have better things to do than spend the night sat among the degenerates of Midgard.”

“I'm not a degenerate,” the toothless man next to Tony slurred.

“Do forgive me,” Loki sneered. “I didn't mean you. I meant these other vagrants who smell slightly less strongly of urine.”

“Actually that smell might be me,” Tony said with a grimace and Loki wrinkled his nose. “Kinda had a little falling-in-piss incident.”

Loki sighed and said, “Stark, have you even told anyone you are here?”

“Like who? Pepper? Happy?” Tony snapped. “Oh yeah, that’s right, kinda too busy being _dead_ to answer the phone.”

Loki stood up and held out his hand. “Come. Now is not the time to be wallowing in misery alone when we can wallow in it together.”

Tony thought for a moment. Was it better to follow a guy who had once thrown him through a window, or spend the night in here, surrounded by drunken lonely bums who were just like him?

He had to admit his curiosity was piqued though. He wanted to how the hell Loki had survived when that ship had started collapsing in on itself less than 30 minutes after he and Natasha had escaped. Loki had looked on the verge of death when they left him, his pulse was thready and weak and his breathing sounded wet and laboured, and yet here he was looking like he was ready to hit a red carpet event.

“I really thought you were dead,” Tony said.

“So did I,” Loki replied quietly. “And most days I wake up disappointed that I am not. It seems a true death is harder for me to attain than most, and believe me, I have tried _many_ times.”

“Don’t talk like that. You’re lucky to be alive,” Tony snapped. “After all the people we saw die you shouldn't be saying things like that.”

“And what of you? You cannot tell me that in your darkest moments, when you wake up screaming from yet another nightmare, that you do not wish you had never made it out of that ship?” Loki asked.

Tony thought for a moment. He wanted to tell Loki that he never had, that he appreciated every single moment he had and that he lived his life to the fullest, just how Pepper would have wanted. She would wouldn't want him to be miserable, she would want him working on projects that would help people, that would save lives, and reduce pollution, not laid on the lounge floor surrounding by empty whiskey bottles, wishing that the process of drinking himself to death didn't take so long.

“I thought so,” Loki said slyly, breaking Tony’s train of thought.

“Whatever,” Tony replied, shaking his head.

“Perhaps I will try it again, tonight. Tell me, do you know any good furnaces in the city? I was thinking this time I might try fire,” Loki said.

“Seriously, don’t say shit like that,” Tony said.

“Well, then I suppose you shall have to come with me to make sure I don’t harm myself on this wonderful evening,” Loki said.

“You aren't going to leave me alone if I don’t come, are you? Tony sighed.

“No, I shall stay here and be annoying until you do as I wish.”

Tony sighed heavily and said, “OK, _OK_ , I’ll come with you, but we need to figure out how the hell to get out of here.”

“A simple matter,” Loki said as tottered slightly to the side.

“If you hadn't noticed we were both kinda arrested and they aren't just gonna let us out of here,” Tony said. “Unless you have some kind of magic trick that is lets us walk through walls or something.”

“There is no need for that,” Loki said, as he moved over to cell door and banged loudly on the bars, then shouted “Guards!”

A burly police officer appeared, and Loki said, “We would like to depart now.”

To Tony’s surprise the man simply nodded and then opened the door, allowing Loki to drag him by the arm out of the cell and into the corridor.

“You take care now, Mister Stark,” the officer said, nodding politely as he handed Tony his coat and a bag of his personal belongings.

“How the hell did you do that?” Tony asked as Loki continued to drag him down the corridor and towards the entrance. “He just let us out without even blinking. Was it some kind of freaky mind control whammy?”

Loki stopped outside the door, turned to Tony and said, “Of course they simply let you out. You were never under arrest, they put you in that cell because they were worried you were going to freeze out there in the cold because you did not care if you lived or died.”

“Oh, and you know that how?” Tony snapped.

“Because when I sit upon the throne of Asgard I can see wherever I choose to send my mind, and when I saw them bring you here I listened to their concerns. They feared for your life, Stark, and so did I.”

Tony stood for a while, bouncing on the balls of his feet, until Loki softly said, “Look, I know it is hard, but it is Christmas and I do not wish to be alone. Will you spend some time with me?”

Tony knew Loki was known as the god of lies for a reason, but the look on his face seemed sincere.

“Oh all right,” Tony said, and then he raised his hand, “But I don’t want any funny business. You even look at me strangely and I am out of here.”

“Wonderful!” Loki exclaimed, and then he turned and walked into the revolving door.

“I have a really bad feeling about this,” Tony said, and then Loki reappeared, still in the revolving door as he merrily pushed it round.

“Come along, Stark. This town will not paint itself red!” Loki said, and then disappeared from sight again.

Tony looked around himself, and then stepped into the door as he mumbled, “Bye police station. Pretty sure I’ll be seeing you again later tonight.”

As he stepped out onto the top of the steps the bitter cold took Tony’s breath away and he quickly pulled his coat on and wrapped his arms around himself. “It is _freezing_ out here.”

“Nonsense,” Loki replied as he admired the Christmas tree that stood in the street and leaned over the railings at the top of the steps. “It appears we are just in time.”

As Tony moved over to Loki’s side he saw a group of police officers gathered round another decorated tree, and they began to sing.

“ _O it may be some day I'll go back to Ireland_

_If it's only at the closing of my day,_

_For to see again the moon rise over Claddagh_

_And to watch the sun go down on Galway Bay.”_

Loki hummed, closed his eyes and smiled. “I love this song.”

“I didn't think you’d be much a Bing Crosby fan,” Tony said as he dug around in his pockets and pulled on a pair of gloves.

“On the contrary,” Loki replied. “Thor and I saw him at the London Palladium in 1977 I think it was, and he was truly a remarkable performer.”

“ _You_ saw Bing Crosby?”

Loki turned and looked at Tony. “Why would that be so hard to believe?”

“I'm just having a bit of a hard time getting my head around you going for the whole _White Christmas_ thing.”

“Peace on Earth and goodwill to all men?” Loki asked with a raised eyebrow. “That hardly seems like something I would be interested in.”

“Exactly my point.”

“No, it was Thor who loved Christmas on Midgard,” Loki said wistfully as he turned back to watch the choir sing. “We celebrated Yule on Asgard, but Thor loved your celebrations far more.”

“You used to visit?”

“Most of our visits were long before you were even born, but every year we would bribe Heimdall with a barrel of finest Mead to turn a blind eye our to our use of the Bifrost.”

“So that’s why you’re here?” Tony asked, as he pushed his still cold hands into his pockets and pulled out a second pair of gloves and pulled them on. “It reminds you of Thor?”

Loki turned back and looked at Tony, his mouth opening, but he seemed to find it hard to find the right words, then he shook his head and said, “Come the city awaits us.”

 

 

Tony followed Loki as they walked down the snow lined avenue alongside Central Park, occasionally pausing to admire the decorations in offices and shop windows.

It didn't take them long to reach Times Square at the relentless pace Loki kept striding along at between his short stops, and as he stopped to view the Christmas tree that was dusted with snow and twinkling lights he sighed, “New York truly is a magnificent city.”

“Be careful,” Tony warned, with a sly smile. “It almost sounds like you regret trying to destroy it.”

Loki smirked and replied, “My only regret is that I never had the chance to rule it.”

“So you’re done with the whole super villain trying to rule Earth thing then?”

“We do two things exceedingly well on Asgard, battle and merriment, and I have had my fill of the first for now,” Loki said with a sad smile.

They meandered down Broadway, dodging the crowds that huddled in theatre doorways to escape the slowly drifting snow and the biting wind that whistled down the street.

“Maybe you should take up acting,” Tony said.

“Acting?” Loki asked, as he pulled his hands out of his pockets, blew into them and then rubbed them together.

“ _Sure_ , you strike me as the diva type with a flair for the dramatic,” Tony said with a smirk.

Loki raised an eyebrow at Tony and then rubbed his hands together again.

“Are you cold?” Tony asked.

“I neglected to bring any gloves with me. I had forgotten how cold Midgard can get.”

“I thought you were an Ice Giant or something?”

Loki turned his head, fixing Tony with a glare, and said, “The term is Frost Giant, and no, when I am in this form I am not one of them. My tolerance for the cold is the same as any Asgardian.”

“Here, stop a second,” Tony said as he moved out of the flow of tourists, grabbed Loki by the elbow and dragged him towards a Theatre canopy.

“What?” Loki asked, looking vaguely annoyed.

“Give me your hand,” Tony said as he ripped off one of his second pair of gloves.

Loki held out his hand tentatively and watched as Tony pulled the glove onto it, and then repeated the process with the other hand.

“Is that better?” Tony asked.

“Thank you,” Loki said quietly. “Your kindness is most unexpected, but very appreciated.”

“Well, I can’t have the future star of _Le Mis_ getting frostbite, can I?” Tony said, then he pushed Loki playfully in the shoulder and said, “Seriously you should audition for something while you’re down here.”

Loki smirked. “I think not.”

“It was worth a shot,” Tony said. “Could have seen your name up in lights.”

They came to a crosswalk and Loki stopped abruptly and said, “Oh my.”

“What?”

“I have been here before,” Loki replied quietly.

“Here as in when you were attacking it?”

Loki shook his head and looked up at the Paramount building. “It has changed a lot, but I still remember it with fondness.”

“How long ago?” Tony asked.

“I believe the year was 1942 on Midgard, and Thor and I spent a full seven days here because father was in the Odinsleep and couldn't chastise us for being away,” Loki said with a soft laugh. “We saw a young singer named Frank Sinatra at one of his first concerts. He went on to become quite famous.”

“Hold up,” Tony said. “You saw Frank Sinatra’s first concert?”

“Oh, yes, and it was quite a disturbing evening,” Loki replied. “I thought the building was about to collapse and the _caterwauling_ … You know, the only time I have heard a similar sound was when Thor was wearing Midgardian trousers and caught his foreskin in the zip.”

“Ouch,” Tony replied.

“Ouch indeed,” Loki agreed.

“You've seen Bing Crosby _and_ Frank Sinatra? Who the hell haven’t you seen?”

“Well, I'm rather disappointed we never saw Elvis perform live,” Loki replied with a grin.

“If you two used to come down here so often then why was Thor so clueless about Earth?”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Thor, as much as it pains me to say, was never witless. He was capable of great cunning and executing complicated plans, but your lives are so short and your culture evolves at a speed to reflect that. What felt like almost no time for us was generations for you mortals.”

“I get it,” Tony said. “You guys are like practically immortal so by the time you came back pretty much everything had changed.”

“Stark, if we were immortal, Thor would be by my side right now, and I wouldn't have to be wasting my time with you,” Loki suddenly snapped.

“Hey,” Tony said, holding his hands up, fearing he was about to get smacked in the face. “I never invited you. I was quite happy having my little pity party alone, but you were the one who insisted on gate crashing it.”

“Well, if you do not wish me to be here I shall take my leave of you. Goodbye, Stark. Do you enjoy your Christmas of sitting alone and crying into your roast beef!” Loki said poisonously, and then he did a dramatic little twirl, his coat flowed out behind him and he vanished into thin air.

“Dammit,” Tony said to himself. “He took my gloves.”


	3. Chapter 3

The next time Tony saw Loki it was Christmas Eve 2019.

Tony had kept himself busy during the spring, fending off the repeated calls from SHIELD for him to get back out in the field.

A new team of Avengers had been formed, all young, bright-eyed things who were eager to please and become heroes, but when the first of them died their attitude soon changed. They pulled together, became a team, and somehow Tony found himself dragged in as a consultant, even though he felt more like a glorified grandfather.

He suited up occasionally, hovering over a battle scene shouting out directions and barking orders, but his heart was never in it, and in September, on a grey rainy day, Tony officially announced the retirement of Iron Man.

It was a blow for SHIELD and the team, but with no lab of his own to work from, living in the penthouse house suite of the swankiest hotel in town really wasn't conducive to high tech engineering at 2am when he couldn't sleep and wasn't drunk enough to pass out.

So it was Christmas eve and Tony decided to go out and get drunk and maybe end up sat in a stream of his own piss again, but no matter how many shots he downed it didn't seem to blot anything out, didn't seem stop the memories of Thor’s broken head or Pepper with her arms wrapped around Happy in the back seat of the armoured Limo.

He was on a chair at the bar of some dive when the air started to swirl around him, crackling with static and giving off a green glow that matched the twinkling fairy lights on the tree.

“Well if it isn’t my old friend, tall, dark and irritating,” Tony said when Loki appeared next to him, in his full battle armour and a smoking spear in his hand.

Loki rested the spear against the bar and pulled himself onto a chair, carefully avoiding sitting on his cape.

“Have you brought my gloves back?” Tony asked. “I seem to remember loaning you a pair, but you vanished without giving them back.”

“If you wish to have them returned I can arrange it,” Loki replied as a golden glow appeared around him and his armour and helmet melted way, revealing a black suit and bow tie.

“Not exactly my first priority,” Tony replied.

“So…” Loki said quietly. “Would you like to spend some time with me this evening?”

“Are you going to get all pissy with me again?” Tony asked.

“It depends upon your line of conversation Loki replied.

“So the rules are that I shouldn't mention the big guy at all?”

“Yes.”

“I think I can manage that,” Tony replied.

They sat and drank until neither of them could stand, and then Loki escorted Tony to a cab and paid the driver double in case of vomit related accidents.

“Bye Loki,” Tony slurred as Loki laid him on the back seat. “Come back and visit next year.”

“I will. Look after yourself this year, Tony, and I will join you again”, Loki replied as he closed the taxi door.

Tony sat up as the taxi pulled away and looked out of the back window of the cab, at Loki surrounded by the glow of the fairy lights that had been strung from the lampposts outside the bar, as snowflakes gently coated his sagging shoulders.

 

 

*

 

The third and fourth Christmases both ended with blazing rows. The third because Tony refused to take no for an answer about why Loki was so opposed to kissing under Mistletoe. Loki quietly mentioned the name ‘Balder’, mumbled something about snake venom and then flown into a range when Tony asked, “What was that?”

The fourth ended with a fight because Tony wanted to take a cab to the next bar and Loki wanted to enjoy a pleasant open air carriage ride in sub zero temperatures.

“It's freezing!” Tony shouted.

“It is not that cold!” Loki shouted back.

“My nose is practically frostbitten and you don't give a shit about anyone else but yourself!”

“You just don't want to pay for it, you miserly old fool!”

“You scum bag!” Tony shouted.

“You maggot,” Loki shouted back. “You cheap, lousy faggot!”

“Oh _hhhh_  homophobia, but I guess being a Viking yo-”

“Homophobia?” Loki asked. “What do you mean?”

“Faggot is a word for someone who isgay, and not a particularly nice one.”

“Oh, I did not mean _that_. I was likening you to a meatball made of pig hearts and liver that is stuffed into the fatty part of a stomach,” Loki replied. “It was very popular dish in England at one time.”

“That sounds disgusting,” Tony said, curling his lip.

“It is, hence my insult,” Loki replied, then he screeched, “You remind me of it!”

“You know what, fuck you!” Tony said, turning away. “Go back to Asgard and sit on your fucking throne!”

“Stark! Don't walk away from me!” Loki shouted. “Stark!”

“Happy Christmas, Loki,” Tony said, turning around, and walking backwards. “Let's hope it's our last.”

Tony turned around and carried on walking into the night.

 

 

And Christmas came and went and every year Loki appeared, no matter where Tony went. Sometimes it was the rooftop bar on the nicest hotel in town, sometimes it was a back street dive where Tony could hide in the shadows, surrounded by drunks who didn't know or didn't care who he was.

“Jane got married,” Tony said, one Christmas as they sat in a dark booth that was decked out with cheap, stringy tinsel.

“She did?” Loki asked, not looking up from his drink.

“Yeah,” Tony replied. “I was invited, but I didn't go.”

“She deserves her happiness,” Loki replied as he dipped his finger in his glass and stirred the ice round with his finger.

“I met him once. Scientist she met through some work she was doing for a SHIELD. Seemed like a good guy.”

“I'm sure he is,” Loki said with a sad smile as he watched the ice cubes in his glass slowly melt.

“What about you?” Tony asked. “Have you met anyone?”

“I am not exactly in the mood for courting lately,” Loki replied with a sigh. “And why would I need anyone when I have you?”

“Have me?” Tony asked, raising his eyebrow. “Why, Mister Odinson, you haven't even taken me on a date yet.”

Loki let out a snort of laughter, and asked, “And where exactly should I take you?”

Tony tapped his knuckles on the table, and stood up. “Come on. I know the perfect place.”

“Where are we going?”

“It's a surprise, Tony said, and later, as they danced through the night, skating round the Rockerfeller ice rink, under the lights of a twinkling Christmas tree, Tony realised that Loki's visits were the only bright spot in his incredibly dark year.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Ten years after Thanos attacked the city, Tony finally completed work on his new home and moved out of his hotel penthouse suite.

“Well, this is a lot more humble than your last abode,” Loki announced, as he appeared on Christmas Eve, leant against the living room doorway of Tony’s new mansion. “Your name isn’t up in lights, emblazoned across the sky for all to see.”

“The days of announcing my home address to every villain, alien and terrorist are long gone,” Tony replied as he stared into the open fireplace.

“I imagined something a lot more ostentatious,” Loki said, and then he ran a finger over the wall. “Oak panelling? Really?”

“I was aiming for traditional,” Tony replied, and then he turned to face Loki. “Actually it’s a treated timber shell over a synthetic Adamantium structure. A little invention of mine that I haven’t told SHIELD about yet.”

Loki grinned and said, “That's more like the Stark I know.”

“Plus, I didn't build up,” Tony said as he tapped three times on the panel next to the fireplace, which moved to the side with a hiss to reveal an elevator door. “I built down.”

“Down? You built a dungeon?” Loki asked.

“Not exactly,” Tony said with a raised eyebrow. “There are three more levels down there. Fully independent oxygen, water and power generation systems and enough food to last for two years. A nuclear bomb could hit this place and whoever was in it would be safe.”

“That hardly seems like the plan of a man content to drink himself to death,” Loki stated.

Tony shrugged. “There’s a fully stocked bar and a still down there too.”

“And is it the only bar in the building?” Loki asked. “I assume it must be, since a gracious host, such as yourself, would have offered me a drink by now.”

“Bar’s in the corner. Knock yourself out,” Tony replied as he closed the hatch that covered the elevator.

Loki unfolded his arms and moved towards the bar, where he investigated the bottles until he found one that met with his approval. He unscrewed the cap and filled a large tumbler almost to the brim with a sickly looking green alcohol.

He took a sip of his drink and then moved over to where Tony stood by the fireplace and asked, “What’s this? Two stockings? Are you expecting company?”

Tony briefly glanced at Loki. Coughed slightly, and said, “Well, I kinda thou-”

“Oh I see,” Loki interrupted as he ran his fingers over the green stocking that hung from the white marble lintel above the fireplace. “This one is for me?”

“Maybe… If you want it,” Tony replied.

Loki smiled, one corner of his mouth quirking up into an almost sarcastic grin. “Such sentimentality, Stark, but a nice thought. Thank you, but I fear I have been a naughty boy this year and my stocking will remain empty.”

“Been up to your old tricks?”

“I may have inadvertently started a war,” Loki replied, grinning so much he could barely take a drink from his glass.

“A _war?_ ” Tony asked.

“In my defence it was only a small war and one must amuse ones self when boredom strikes,” Loki replied.

Tony turned back towards the fire and laughed.

 

 

At some point during the night, after he had finished a bottle of Absinthe, a bottle of champagne and two bottles of Vodka, Loki flopped to the floor and announced he was sleeping in front of the fire and shouldn't be disturbed until at least spring.

“Do you need a bucket?” Tony asked. “I don’t want you throwing up that green shit you were drinking on my new carpets.”

“Just leave me be,” Loki slurred, as he waved his arm pathetically at Tony and curled into a ball on his side.

Tony grabbed his arm as it waved in the air and pulled. “Get up. You are not sleeping on my floor.”

“No, Thor _rrrr_ ,” Loki whined. “Let me sleep.”

Tony lowered Loki’s arm back to his side and closed his eyes, trying to steady his emotions for a minute, and then he knelt on the floor.

“Loki,” he said, gently patting him on the cheek. “Come on, get up. You’ll be more comfortable in a bed.”

Loki suddenly sat up, and looked around himself. “Where did Thor go?”

“Thor’s gone, Loki,” Tony sighed. “You remember, right?”

Loki's face crumpled slightly. “Forgive me. I know not what I say.”

“It's OK,” Tony replied. “That's kinda the aim of drinking. The forgetting part. I just don't seem to be able to manage it lately.”

 

*

 

It was Christmas eve, and Tony was 65 when he flopped back into the snow in the garden outside his mansion and asked Loki if he had ever made a snow angel.

“What are you doing?” Loki asked, almost dropping the bottle of Whiskey he held in his gloved hand. “You’ll freeze.”

“Come on, get down here,” Tony shouted as he waved his arms and legs in the snow. “You’re a Frost Giant. A bit of snow won’t bother you.”

“As I have told you repeatedly I'm not a Frost Giant in this form. My tolerance for the cold is the same as any Asgardian.”

“Come _onnnnnn_ ,” Tony whined.

“Oh all right,” Loki said, as he placed the bottle securely in a snow drift between them and flopped down beside Tony. “Should I end up laying in something disgusting, you’re paying to have my suit cleaned, Stark.”

“Fair enough,” Tony replied. “OK, so what you do is you flap your arms and legs like this, and voilà, snow angel.”

Loki copied Tony's movements, and then said, “I feel quite ridiculous, and not particularly angelic.”

“You can't really see the effect till you get up, and to be honest I don't feel much like getting up,” Tony said.

They lay in silence for a moment, gazing up at the snow clouds, tinted orange by the glow of the city lights, and then Loki asked, “Do you think Christmas carols are disturbing?”

Tony propped himself up on one elbow, reached for the Whiskey bottle, and said, “What?”

“ _He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake_ ,” Loki sang. “Does that not sound a little alarming?”

“Are you calling Santa a stalker?” Tony asked.

“ _He knows if you've been bad or good. So be good for goodness sake_ ,” Loki sang again. “That part sounds like a threat.”

“Santa leaves you coal in your stocking if you've been bad.”

“And perhaps the coal is meant to serve as a warning. If you are bad Santa might burn your house down next year.”

Tony let out a laugh, then raised the bottle to his mouth, and downed a few gulps.

“If Santa can see everything, then perhaps he is actually Heimdall?” Loki said, and then he added, “Oh wait Heimdall is dead. Does that mean Santa is dead?”

“I think you need more booze,” Tony said, handing Loki the bottle. “Come on, let's get up and observe our host of angels before my ass freezes.”

They climbed to their feet, taking care not to disturb the snowy outlines, and Loki said, “They don't look very much like angels.”

“Are you kidding me? They look _so_ much like angels!” Tony said, and then he sang, “ _Hark! The snoowww angels sing, Glory to the Asgardian king!_ ”

Loki let out a snorting laugh, and continued, “ _Peace on Midgard and mercy mild. A god and a sinner reconciled._ ”

Tony laughed, and sighed thoughtfully. “Are we? Reconciled, I mean?”

“I like to think so,” Loki replied quietly. “Come on. Let us get you inside, old man.”

“Hey, less of the old!” Tony said cheerfully, as he started up the garden path, back towards the mansion, and then he put his arms in the air, and sang loudly, “ _Joyful all ye nations rise! Join the triumph of the skies!_ ”

 

*

 

The 15th year after attack the on New York was a bad one for Tony. He made the mistake of commissioning a memorial to all those who died on that day, and had it built upon the vacant land where the Avengers Tower used to stand.

He thought it would be a shining beacon of hope that would inspire everyone across the city, but as he looked at it from his bedroom window, all it did was mark out the spot on the horizon where he lost everything and everyone he ever cared about.

Tony did not attend the dedication ceremony. He spent it passed out in the underground levels of his mansion, and when he woke he altered JARVIS's protocols, and began work on a new project.

 

 

When Loki arrived on Christmas Eve it seemed he was faring no better than Tony was, as he laid on the rug in front of the blazing fire, with a faint green glow round his fingertips as he flipped through playlist on Tony's music system and finally settled on a haunting Ludovico Einaudi piece.

“This isn’t your usual festive cheer,” Tony said, as he watched Loki close his eyes.

“Forgive me if I am not feeling all together cheery,” he replied.

“Bad year?”

“You could say that,” Loki replied, with his eyes still shut.

“So what exactly do you do all year?” Tony asked. “Go out and cause mischief all over the place?”

“I rule Asgard.”

Tony was puzzled, and asked, “But… they’re all dead, right?”

“I do not need subjects to be a king,” Loki replied. “I only require a kingdom.”

“So you spend all year in Asgard, alone?” Tony gasped.

“Not all year,” Loki replied. “I visit you.”

“I won't be here forever, Loki,” Tony said quietly.

“I know,” Loki said so softly it was barely a whisper.

“So what will you do?” Tony asked. “When I'm gone?”

“I am not sure,” Loki replied. “Perhaps I shall go travelling to the outer reaches and find Thanos.”

“You know he would kill you.”

“And that would entirely be the point,” Loki sighed. “Perhaps he would finally be able to give me the death I ache for.”

Tony knew he should say something, try to talk him out of it, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He felt the same way.

“Your myths foretold a death for Thor at the hands of the serpent, but I always thought that one day we would kill each other after years of pointless battle,” Loki said. “I never thought for a second that it would end like this, with him going first.”

“It's late,” Tony said. “You're just tired.”

“Aye, I am. I am tired of death and misery and being utterly _alone_.”

“You could come see me more often,” Tony said.

“Stark, you said yourself you do not have much time left and I will be forced to watch you die, slowly, in front of my eyes and then I will be left alone _again_. I cannot take it _any_ longer.”

“I know how you feel,” Tony said, closing his eyes.

“At least you have the option of death,” Loki said. “Even if you couldn't do it yourself, all you need do is wait, and eventually it will catch up with you. If I die with a knife in my hand in battle at least I would get to see Thor once more in Valhalla, but it seems that I am condemned to simply fade away into nothingness.”

Tony stood quietly for a moment, and then said, “I made myself a new suit recently. Gave it a new self destruct system, but it has this tiny little flaw in it.”

Loki opened his eyes and gave Tony a confused look. “And that is?”

“JARVIS, bring up the schematics for the Mark 49,” Tony said.

“As you wish, sir,” JARVIS replied tersely.

A glowing hologram appeared in the air showing outlines of the new armour Tony had designed and he flicked through the pages until he found the diagram he wanted and then drew his hands apart, expanding the image.

“See this fold in the metal here?” Tony asked, as he pointed out a line in the front of the suit, just below the arc reactor. Loki nodded. “ _Heaven forbid_ that anyone ever finds out about it, but one well placed blow here, and its game over for me and anyone stood within 6 feet of me.”

“Game over?” Loki asked.

“Lights out, as in completely obliterated,” Tony replied. “Thor once told me about the Dark Elf weaponry and that mini black hole thing sounded kinda neat, so I made my own.” Tony shrugged, and continued, “Shame its so unstable that someone could set if off with just a knife.”

“I see,” Loki replied as he rubbed his chin.

“Great suit though isn’t?” Tony asked, as he shuffled through the holograms again and brought up the coloured external design. “Really distinctive colouring, with just the plain red. You couldn't mistake it for one of the other ones.”

“But you are an Avenger no longer?” Loki asked. “What reason would you have for wearing your suit once more?”

“Maybe one day, eventually, an old enemy shows up, one that I was familiar with or had fought before, it would make sense for me to go up against them again,” Tony said with a shrug. “Maybe that old enemy would get lucky and set off the self destruct.”

“But surely your A.I. would prevent you from creating such a device?”

“JARVIS has a new set of protocols, which means he can't stop me doing anything I want, even if he thinks it's a bad idea.”

Loki looked at the design closely, and quietly asked, “And you think it would work?”

“I'm certain it would work,” Tony nodded.

 

 *

 

It was a dreary, damp April day when Tony got a call from the new director of SHIELD saying that Loki was in Times Square destroying everything that moved.

“Tony, we need your help,” he said. “You've been up against Loki before. If he has any weaknesses, we need to know them now.”

It took Tony exactly 12 minutes to arrive at Times Square.

Awed by the unexpected presence of Iron Man, the new Avengers team moved back behind him as he walked forward.

Loki stood among the wreckage of smoking cars, and held his head up high. “Have you come to challenge me, Man of Iron?”

“I have,” Tony replied, raising the faceplate of his helmet.

“You must have a death wish if you think you can defeat me, Stark,” Loki said, a soft smile creeping across his face.

Tony smiled, and said, “It's time to end this, Loki.”

A knife appeared in Loki's hand, and he said, “Aye, it is.”

They surged towards each other. Loki grabbed Tony by the back of the neck, pulling him close, and whispered, “Thank you.”

Tony wrapped one arm round Loki’s back, then placed his hand over Loki’s, wrapping it round the hilt of the knife, and together they drove it into the fold of the metal.

 

*

 

The reports that came into SHIELD varied in their details.

Some reported that Loki stabbed Tony in chest after they traded blows.

Some reported that it was Loki who had conjured the blinding whirlpool of light that had sucked them both in.

All the reports agreed on one thing: both Tony and Loki were smiling as they were obliterated by the black hole.

 

*

 

That year, on December the 24th, the NYPD choir stand and sing their songs around the tree, and for the first time in 16 years, no snow falls on Christmas Eve. 

 

 

 


End file.
